I feel so fortunate to have chosen a mentor who fits me so well for where I am now! I thought it was timely to talk about making decisions and how to choose the right people to come into your life. Because this is absolutely critical for your success. You have probably heard that your life is a reflection of the five people you spend most of your time with. So choosing those peope is VERY important.

Have you ever felt like you made the wrong choice in employees, mentors, clients or even a your partner?

Have you ever
- been disappointed by a mentor who you felt didn’t deliver what you wanted?
- attracted a business partner/supplier and then felt ‘ripped off’?
- attracted an employee that didn’t work out as expected?
- had a partner that caused you heartache because you just weren’t a good fit for each other?

Most people would have experienced at least one of these scenarios, I know I have. So how does this happen and how can we prevent it?

There are two main reasons we make the wrong decision about people:

1. We don’t have enough criteria for making the decision and the ones we have are not specific enough

2. We put up the wrong criteria down because our self image keeps us thinking too small of ourselves and our possibilities.

Let’s deal with Obstacle No 1: How can you make a good decision if you don’t have enough criteria? How many are enough?
Take a piece of paper, think of a decision (for a client, partner, mentor, etc.) you have made recently and write down your criteria for making that decision. How many did you come up with, 5 or 6? If you came up with 10 you are better than average. Now you want to double that at least! Yes that’s right, I am serious you need at least 20 criteria. If you are looking for a partner, you want to have even more than that, at least fill an entire A4 page.

What will the criteria be?
First and foremost think of how you want the relationship to be with the person. Most people don’t do this and only focus on characteristics of the person. Big mistake! The relationship with you is what counts the most (eg. for a client: treats me with respect, shows up on time, raves about me to others…) that’s what will ultimately determine your success or otherwise.

A lot of people feel that this approach limits them in their choice and that’s just not true. If you don’t know what you want, anyone or noone is right. If you are clear about it your eyes will open to the specific people that truly would be a good match. It’s kind of like when you decide to buy a blue Toyota Corolla hatchback and then you see them everywhere on on the street. They were always there but you just didn’t see them before.

Be as specific as possible: What do you see, hear, feel that tells you the relationship is ideal?
Be positive in your description: EG. don’t say “he’s not lazy” say “He’s proactive in suggesting improvements”.
Remember the basics: If you want a male partner, make sure you put ‘male’ on your list!

Now to Obstacle No 2:

What is your self image? How confident are you of your own abilities? For Example: If you want a mentor for yourself and you feel intimidated by the idea of sharing your ideas with them you may attract someone who is too directive, takes over or simply underdelivers to your expectations. It is important that you see yourself as an equal, that you are clear what you want to get out of the relationship and how you need to behave in order to get that result.

Ask yourself: What are my beliefs around this relationship?

Here is my example for attracting the right mentor: I believe that
- my mentor is a resource available for me and my responsibility for using to my advantage.
- the investment I make into my mentor has to repay itself quickly and I need to reach a set Return on investment within a year from the relationship.
- I am an equal to my mentor, they simply have more skills and experience in an area I want to grow into
- It is my right and responsibility to speak up when something about the relationship isn’t working.

These beliefs keep me empowered and help me to make the most of the mentor relationship.

So can you see the benefit in this approach?

It’s your turn now:

Business Mindset Breakthrough Assignment:

1. Think of a person you want to attract into your life (can be a partner, mentor, employee or client).
2. Make a list of all the criteria they need to fulfill, be sure to write a minimum of 20 specific ones
3. Check your beliefs around the relationship you want to have with them. Are they keeping you powerful? If not, what do you need to believe instead to empower yourself?

Watch out, amazing things happen when you do this, the ideal people come out of the woodworks, maybe tomorrow maybe in a couple of weeks, you’ll see.

I would love to know how you went with this process and what it did for you, so please leave me a comment here on my blog.

To your Empowerment,
Yvonne

Meeting Kendall, my Million Dollar Mentor in Tucson Arizona!

I had an amazing time at the Money, Marketing and Soul Coach Certification training in Tucson Arizona. As you can see, I am evolving and my business is evolving with me. I had been searching for a long time for a way to combine my business expertise with my NLP and Coaching skills and I have finally found it. I now have the tools to not only transform my own business but to help other coaches, consultants, natural therapists and other solopreneurs to transform theirs .

What does that mean exactly? Well, it means evolving my business model to include multiple streams of income, leveraging my time so I can serve more clients while having more time off and yes, making a lot more money. I have no qualms about this, I believe that it’s important to find a way to follow your passion and be paid very well for using your talents.

The business and marketing models I am planning to adopt are unique in the Australian marketplace. I am so excited to be at the forefront and pioneer this exciting stuff before passing it on and having others benefit from it. Stay tuned for more information on this if you are curious to find out how it could help you. I will soon open a separate subscription to weekly Articles on Marketing and Business Building Topics for Coaches, Consultants, Wellness Professionals and other Subject Matter Experts.

I was made aware of this video from one of my friends on Twitter (btw while you are at it, follow me on twitter)

When I watched this I immediately applied it to networking. Many people think that in order to be good networkers they have to be experts, provide incredible value, be someone, etc. when really all that is required, is to make someone else feel good about themselves. Watch this video and discover the true power of connecting with people!

It’s 15 minutes well spent!

Would love to know what you think about it! Please leave me a comment!

Yvonne

Hi there all, yes I am back already because I really want you to get a mindset breakthrough on this one because I know it will lead to a business breakthrough as well!

Do you remember one of the questions from my last post on the “I’m not good enough‘ phenomenon?

“Am I prepared to do what it takes to reach this standard I set for myself?”

Whether you are aware of it or not, you are asking yourself this question every time you are setting standards/goals for yourself. And sometimes your standards are so high that this question sends you straight into a state of OVERWHELM.  Because in your mind, you are picturing all the things you need to do to get to this standard.  For me this is like standing right in front of a huge mountain I need to climb to get to my goal and it feels like the pathway is ‘endless’ and it will take ‘forever’ to get to my outcome. And that’s what I will say to myself in my head with a bit of a sigh.  The next thing that happens is that all Motivation is sucked out of me because it’s all too hard. Can anyone relate to that?

So does it make sense then when I say that thinking  ‘I’m not good enough‘ is often simply a matter of being overwhelmed with all the things that need to be done (in your mind) in order to ‘be good enough‘?

Interestingly, often when you break this ‘mountain’ down, what you find is that it is much more managable than you think. And even if it takes a year or two to get it, that’s still faster than not getting it at all!!!

Interesting, isn’t it?

So here is your Business Mindset Breakthrough Assigment:

Think of something that you feel you are ‘not good enough’ to achieve.  Become aware of that ‘mountain’ you have to climb and ask yourself these  questions:

- What specifically are all those things you need to do, and how long exactly are they going to take? Make a list, write them down including time estimates!

- Do you really need to do ALL of these things in order to reach that standard? Go through them and challenge each one.

- Is the reward you will reach for putting in the time it will take to do this, worth it in the end? How much money will you make, how much enjoyment will you get out of it, how much self confidence, etc….

- If the answer to the above question is yes, then how can you incorporate the steps to this outcome into your daily life? Get your diary out and get specific!

Let me know how you go with this assignment! Would love to hear from you!

Here is to your Empowerment,

Yvonne